Showing posts with label gratitude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gratitude. Show all posts

Monday, May 27, 2013

Take An Appreciation Break :-)



Right now, give yourself a few moments of your time. Take a couple of long slow luxurious breaths. After you have relished that sweet release, ponder and appreciate at least one thing that went right today... and if that feels good, keep going! ♥

I found this image on the Facebook page Sun Gazing.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

God is my Skeleton


I use the word God... a lot. God means different things to different people and it came to me that perhaps I should clarify. I was born Episcopalian and then I met my spiritual teacher, who is Hindu, when I was about eleven. I am neither and I am both. I believe that nothing exists that is not "God". It could be called Atman, consciousness, Shiva, Zeus, Thor or by any word designated to the being that is all pervasive. I believe in unity and acceptance. I also assume that since we have different words in different languages for almost everything that it makes sense that we would have different names for that which is formless. A rose is a rose is a rose... Alrighty then!

So the other day I was japa walking through the snow when the poem "Footprints in the Sand" came into my head. I've always been rather fond of that poem. I suddenly felt a rush of gratitude for my life. I realized that, though my life has not always been easy, I have never really gone without. I've always had a roof over my head and food, usually very good food, to eat. I don't feel like God was carrying me or even walking beside me, I feel that God has always been my skeleton, holding me up when I couldn't do it for myself. The wave of gratitude became so strong that I actually had tears in my eyes. I am a big old sap, and that's just the way I like it!

Saturday, February 9, 2008

She's Going the Distance. . .


This post is not about Oprah but I just want to start by telling you that I am in utter awe of her commitment to the enlightenment of the world! She just did a second follow up show on "The Secret" and it was just perfect for me and what I was needing to hear. Settle in gang, I have a lot to say today. Where to begin... Okay I've got it. I have had the great good fortune to grow up with a spiritual teacher who told me, repeatedly, that the most important thing in the world was to love myself. I've always known the Truth of this in my heart but the experience of it is another story. I am not saying that I have terrible self esteem, my self esteem is not too bad. I've done a good deal of intensive therapy to overcome some out dated survival techniques that I learned as a child. Like every person I've ever met, my childhood was less than ideal and I picked up some issues along the way. I would say that in some ways I've had better than average self esteem and in others I've had less. Anyway, my point is that I've been learning for almost thirty years what it means to truly love myself. It has been a fantastic and terrible journey and it's left me baffled more than once.

A couple of years ago I was at a low point in my quest. I was depressed and truly felt like I was drowning. And then I had a conversation with a man who'd just returned from Brazil where he'd visited a healer that I had wanted to see for several years, John of God (Joao de Deus). We spoke for some time as the man described how his heart had been healed. I knew his words to be true because he had been a notoriously angry and hateful man in the community and he was the father of a friend of mine as well. When I met him he was an extremely kind and gentle soul. His son had told me that his father was a changed man, and the change was unbelievable. So, on that day, I made a promise to myself that I would go to see John of God within the next couple of years and that I would ask for him to heal the deep sadness that I'd lived with for most of my life. The moment that I made the promise to myself I felt the weight on my chest lighten.

Several days later I went to see my Nurse Practitioner and I told her that I'd been feeling pretty depressed and how, simply making a decision to do something about it had greatly lightened my load. She suggested that I get a dvd that she'd seen called "The Secret". She was the third person to suggest this to me and so I decided that it was time to check out this amazing dvd. So I went onto the internet, found the site after some searching and purchased this strange looking dvd. At the time "The Secret" was only available from their own site and it was not very well known so it was a little hard to find. I watched it the moment that it arrived and then I watched it every day for a month and a half after that, sometimes several times a day. (I am obviously a huge fan of "The Secret".) The information was not new to me and, in fact, I had actually done a two day seminar with Esther Hicks several years before, but it came at just the right time and it had exactly what I needed. Also it was a fantastic tool for me because I needed something that I could get into my bones and what better way than watching a movie that is fun and exciting and uplifting and... The Truth?

People who say that it is too focused on obtaining material possessions apparently did not watch the entire film or perhaps they saw what they wanted to see. The teachers in "The Secret" clearly state, a number of times, that; money and possessions will not bring happiness, and that manifestation will not work if you are simply focused on getting a lot of stuff. The fact of the matter is that to get to the point where one has the ability to manifest, one generally must first become a happier and more balanced person. So if a person starts the journey because they want more stuff, they will probably not be that same person when they achieve the goal of manifestation. In my opinion it doesn't really matter why a person is motivated to work on themselves for the work to bear fruit. If you ask me the more the merrier and apparently Oprah feels the same way;

No matter any criticism for The Secret, Oprah says she still believes it's valuable. "I'm grateful that for so many millions of people the door was at least opened to the idea that we are each responsible for the quality of our lives,"

I love you Oprah, you truly rock! So, moving along, it's been about two years since I first started watching "The Secret" and I am a totally different person, I am actually quite used to change though, I grew up with constant change and very little same. Even so it has been an amazing two years and I have done A LOT of work on myself. I started keeping a gratitude journal, meditating and exercising regularly again, which I hadn't been doing for quite some time. I started two blogs and writing for a couple of content websites. I found CafePress.com and discovered that I love to create designs, and from people's reactions to my designs I am apparently quite good at it. So now I have two websites that sell my designs, one for spiritual designs and one for silly and funny designs.

Saying that I had never been very good at "creating abundance" in my life would be a gross understatement. I grew up in a family and community where money was not the goal of life. Don't get me wrong I had worked since I was eleven, I enjoyed working, but never with the goal of having a lot of money. Stuff was not my thing and I pretty much always had enough anyway... just enough. As years went on I had more and more difficulty with this and eventually I just kind of gave up on abundance. It suddenly became a huge issue in my life when I started feeling like a failure because of my handicap... my self esteem plummeted. Luckily I have a guardian angel who whispered "The Secret" into my ear three times. So for two years I did everything that I learned to create abundance in my life but to no avail. I definitely brought a lot more joy and peace into my life but abundance continued to elude me. My self esteem managed to climb out of the gutter and clean herself off only to look around and find that the fear of failure was standing and waiting for the right moment to push her down again. And then along came Oprah and some friends to save the day!

I came away from Oprah's latest follow up on "The Secret" with valuable insight. I've watched it twice, to firm it up, and I'll probably watch it a few more times. What I got was not new information, as with "The Secret", but the timing was right and I was ready, nay desperate, to hear it. After a ridiculous number of years I was finally able to penetrate the freakin' armor around my heart! These tips will, perhaps, sound simple and silly but they are working for me, so here you go;

1.) The key to everything is to love yourself. Even if you think that you do love yourself try this anyway and see what happens. Look at yourself in a mirror and say "I love you, I really, truly love you." Look into your eyes when you say this and try to mean it, even if you feel silly. Try to feel it. When I say love I mean the kind of love that a mother is meant to feel for a child. The love that God feels for us. Unconditional adoration with a healthy dose of comforting affection. It felt great to me... after the initial weirdness wore off.

2.) Figure out any hidden resentments that you may have in your life and just let them go. Find it in your heart to forgive the transgressor no matter how horrible their offense. This is just good advice, regardless, but sometimes these resentments can feel justified. Holding onto resentment will keep you from fully achieving your goals so "justified" or not only you are suffering. I found some that were eking out an existence in my soul and I am working on shooing them out. It's not always easy but it sure is necessary.

3.) Figure out how to let go of any fear or feelings of needing whatever it is that you are wanting in your life. When you visualize, do it with joy and then offer it up to God or the universe or whoever and then move along. Give the decision of the how and even the what to your higher power, do not feel that you are manifesting but instead that you are simply putting it out there and then getting on with the business of loving yourself and choosing to be joyful.

After watching the Secret Follow Up for the second time I ran a bubble bath to give myself a boost. I got into the tub and as I leaned back I noticed that the bubbles had formed into the shape of a perfect heart. For a moment I just smiled and laughed. I have been finding heart shapes all around me for well over a year. I have written about them and I have photos of some, like this one of the heart cloud that was over my house. It was better before I ran inside to get my camera but it's still pretty cool. It happens so often that my friends and family just laugh now when I point them out. So... back in the bubble bath, the reason for all of the crazy hearts suddenly hit me like a bolt of lightning. The Universe had been trying to tell me to actively love myself for over a year! I looked towards heaven and said, "Thank You!" out loud and then tears of gratitude streamed down my face. I couldn't believe it. If you could see all of the amazing hearts that have formed around me you would be too. ( A couple of them are here. The dog pee one is very funny.) And as the steam from my bath hovered around me a list of people that I was grateful to streamed through my head as though I were giving an acceptance speech of some kind... "I want to thank my mom and dad. Thank you to my teacher and her teacher and his teacher. Thank you Esther Hicks and Abraham. Thank you Cealo...." and the list went on and the tears flowed.

It all boiled down to this in my head; The Truth is that there is nothing that exists that is not God (or whatever word you choose to call that), and the key to life is to simply, or not so simply, LOVE YOURSELF! No matter what, for no other reason than because you exist and with a whole and joyous heart. Go look in the mirror and say "I love you, I really, and truly love you!"... and then believe it. In the immortal words of the Nike Corporation, "Just do it."

Oh yes and, by the way, one of my best friends is taking me to Brazil with her to see John of God in April. (As a thank you gift but that's another story.) I will be there for my fortieth birthday, which I personally find to be quite auspicious. Et Voila! If that's not manifestation than I don't know what is. Go forth and manifest! Oh, and check out Oprah's web page about the follow up to "The Secret".

Thank you Oprah. Thank you Louise Hay. Thank you God, Buddha, Allah, Vishnu, Shiva, Zeus, Jesus, Thor and Mother Earth!

Friday, September 28, 2007

Power Animals! Who'd A Thunk It?

















I have been a creature lover since... the beginning of time! I love all creatures except for mosquitoes (sorry mosquitoes!). Once, when I was very young, I was strolling down the street with my family in Provincetown, MA when suddenly they realized I was no longer walking with them. (In those days this was not quite as alarming as it would be today.) My family backtracked and found me in a biker-y bar hugging a Great Dane. I saw him and just walked right in and latched on without so much as backwards glance! Also, I have always talked to creatures. Not like an animal communicator, I just talk to them. I like to think they get the drift but, if nothing more, I suppose that they feel my respect and love. It is my wish that every creature feel these things. Anyway, as usual, I digress and digress and...

If you've followed either of my blogs you will note that eagles come up quite often. I have a whole mess of em living near me and flyin' around above me. I see them pretty much every day now. I find that I actually feel incredibly strong feelings of love, gratitude, peace and joy when I see them. I also feel power surging through my being. Not wild raw power but what I can only describe as graceful liquid power. Often times I will see them when I am doing my yoga practice on the grass and it's like drinking a power drink. Seriously. I am not certain if my words do the experience justice. Alas! I only have my words to convey my feelings!

So, the other day several eagles came flying across the lake and I stopped to gaze upon their glory. I was pondering my infatuation with these majestic creatures and it occurred to me that eagles really and truly are my power animal! My mom had a boutique for many years that sold Native American art and 'stuff' and I've read plenty of books that include references to and stories about such things, so power animals are not a new concept for me. However, until I had this experience I honestly never really understood how real they actually are. I do indeed get power from seeing them. Whether they are 30 feet away or a mile I get the same intense jolt every single time I see them. It's very difficult to take my eyes away from them. Now, as much as I love creatures, I've never had this reaction before. I mentioned my revelation to my dad and he said that this had occurred to him as well.

Lately I see eagles almost everywhere I go, so far, in about a sixty mile radius. I see them pretty much every time I drive. Two or three times I've had one pause for like five to ten seconds directly above my head. They truly are masters of the wind! Sometimes they fly through the yard only twelve feet or so off the ground which is very cool. Finally, I'm sure this is not as fascinating for y'all as for me, one time I had one land on a tree close by. Amazingly I'd remembered my camera, which I grabbed and walked as closely as I could get to him/her (there was a fence between us). I talked to the beauty and snapped photos for about ten minutes. (That's him/her to the right.) I figured that eagles must be making some kind of a massive comeback but I looked online and so far I've found no information supporting an eagle boom.

I decided to write a little something about my experience so I jumped online and googled power animals and found a lot of interesting info. My favorite site is Shamanism ~ Working With Animal Spirits Core. They have a list of animals and their particular wisdom. It's a beautiful site and quite informative as well. Here is what the site says about Bald Eagle;

Bald Eagle's Wisdom Includes:

It's pretty cool. I actually do have really keen sight. When I go to the eye doctor they tell me to read until I can't read anymore and then they always stop me and tell me to stop showing off! I've been told my insight ain't too bad either! And as for the rest of the list, well, I definitely have the capacity for all of them and I would certainly like to cultivate those qualities and fully realize and embrace their potential in myself! What a truly wonderful life!

Through my further research on the subject I found out that we may have several power animals looking out for us and they can change over time. When we disconnect from one we may form a new bond with a new friend! I remembered having feelings similar to my eagle 'infatuation' with Pelicans, oddly enough! And at that time a Pelican landed about a foot away from me and just sat there for about ten minutes. I felt so incredibly privileged but I did not consider the possibility that he was a messenger or helper. Duh! So, today, I clicked on Pelican and here's what it said;

Pelican's Wisdom Includes:

I was going through a very difficult time with my (now) ex-husband when Pelican came to call. We were having some money troubles and I was beginning to see that he had some very serious personality issues that I'd not realized before. It's hard to explain but when I read this list the whole Pelican experience made sense to me. I still love Pelicans and I hope that they will always be here to help me out! So there you have it, gang, power animals are very real... So if you see a creature and have a strong emotional response, check out Shamanism ~ Working With Animal Spirits Core. They might have something very interesting to convey!

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Need A Boost?

I was feelin' a tiny tad blue this morning... no big thang, it happens. Anyway, I turned on my computer and opened a photo that my brother had sent me yesterday. The photo is of me and my nephew, Sundar. It boosted me right up! I am incredibly blessed with a wonderful family and superfantastic friends. When I think about it I feel such beautiful gratitude and joy naturally ensues. So... No more blues! Gratitude works everytime, without exception.

Another favorite mood booster of mine is Coldplay mixed with nature. I put on my iPod, cue up Speed of Sound from Coldplay, go outside, sit down on the grass and look up. Luckily for me I have about seven eagles nesting near my house. If I sit tight for a wee bit o' time I usually get the awe inspiring experience of an eagle or three soaring above me. Once I had the good fortune of having one land in a tree next to me. I adore eagles. I never knew this until I saw them in 'person'. So go outside and look up! Who knows what you might see?

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Finding My Inner Yogini

I had my first Hatha Yoga experience somewhere around the age of eleven or twelve. I was visiting my father at the ashram where he was living. My cousin had introduced him to her Guru and he never looked back. From that time on he lived primarily in ashrams, in the United States as well as in India. Slowly family members began following his lead and soon my entire family were living at the ashram. The clothing in the ashram was extremely modest in those days, the Hatha Yoga teacher would wear a floor length skirt and a long sleeved blouse and the demonstrator usually wore a punjabi. I remember most clearly the guided savasana and the powerful effect that her words had on my body. I actually still use several of that teacher's phrases in my own relaxation. I can still hear her soft reassuring voice in my head as I guide myself into Savasana.

I have spent most of my life traveling and moving around, first with my family and then on my own. The longest time that I've spent living in an ashram was a little over two and a half years, I am the exception in my family. Anyway, it was during that particular time that I trained to be a Hatha Yoga teacher. For a brief period I taught my own classes but I preferred giving private lessons and adjusting for other teachers' classes. I do not really enjoy public speaking and simply feel more comfortable working one on one with people. At that time I was living in India and the rooms the teachers were given to practice in were in a beautiful small house surrounded by Plumeria trees. If you are unfamiliar with Plumeria trees they are flowering trees and the blooms are gorgeous and fragrant! It was a heavenly experience to be sure!

At that time I had a truly fantastic and wonderfully motivating teacher. His depth of understanding the body and the postures as well as his conveyance of that knowledge into his students' bodies is truly phenomenal. He has his own school now and I could not be happier or more grateful to have worked with him. Digressing! Since then I have moved numerous times and arisen from many an ash pile as the Phoenix reborn! Hatha Yoga pops in and out of my life like a good old friend that doesn't need constant attention to stay close to my heart. Also my old teacher's voice has never left my head. His words and his principles were so firmly planted in my body that every time I practice, if I focus, my body practically self adjusts!

About a year and a half ago I began to recreate myself yet again! I started keeping a gratitude journal, taking better care of my body and mind and meditating regularly again. I also started playing with my dog as a form of exercise which I highly recommend. After awhile playing with my dog opened out into really just spontaneous playing. I started skipping around and doing cartwheels and somersaults, like a young girl! In the winter, my precious pup and I would tumble and roll around in the snow. I learned that I could actually enjoy cold weather, which I never had before. It was amazing and inspiring and it helped me to open up my heart to my own self! Wah!

Finally this Spring I was playing with the dogs outside when suddenly I just felt like breakin' into Surya Namaskar... so I did. Now I do my yoga practice outside, right on the grass, nearly every day and I have never enjoyed Hatha Yoga more. At 39 I feel more connected to my body, the postures and the shakti than I have ever felt before. I am also stronger and more flexible than I've ever been and people tell me I look fantastic, which isn't neccessary but it certainly feels good. Through the ebb and flow of my ever-changing life, I will always have Hatha Yoga to come home to. I've found my inner yogini this summer and though it's likely that she will disappear again I know she'll always be there when I truly need her. Sadgurunath Maharaj Ki Jai!

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Aaah! The Power and Wisdom of Intention

I first watched The Secret a little over a year ago. After my first viewing I watched it every day for over a month. I tried creating a vision board but ended up with a collage of a magical garden with a hummingbird and my teacher and Lakshmi hanging out with me and my best friend Pam. It's quite beautiful and everyone loved it so much that I made one for my mom for her birthday. I actually didn't really feel that I had accomplished what I had set out to do but I loved the collage and that was great.

At the same time I went through some magazines and picked out a few pages with photos of things that I wanted to change in my life. I only remember two of the pages one was a woman doing yoga and one was a photo of some healthy looking organic food. Lastly I wrote in a gratitude journal every day for a few months and then off and on for the past year or so. In my gratitude journal I write about the love that I feel radiating from inside and out. I express gratitude for my healthy, strong, lithe and beautiful body mind and spirit. I say thank you for the ease with which I walk through this life. There are other things but those are the constants.

Here I am about a year from the first time I watched The Secret. Let's see... I am doing yoga every day because I feel like doing it not because I feel I should be doing it. Also I feel stronger and more present in my postures than I ever have and I actually taught yoga many years ago! I eat almost entirely organic and my diet in general is much more healthy, again because I crave these foods now. I do my yoga practice in a garden where there are, I'm not kidding, two or three hummingbirds buzzing around and occasionally alighting on a branch near me. There is a baby bunny who pops out once in awhile and has actually fallen asleep near me. Majestic eagles soar above me almost every day. One day two baby deer were laying down in the field next to me quietly watching. Could this garden be any more magical? I find heart shapes everywhere. If you want to see a couple more of them go to this posting from my other blog TempleGreen. You will likely be surprised. I still get these hearts all the time.

I am more relaxed and calm than I have ever been. My family and friends have all noted and praised the change in me. More importantly I have noted the change in me. After many years of being told that I must first love myself... I DO! I really do feel incredible love for myself. I still get the old crap rearing it's head occasionally but it has so much less power than ever before. I might listen for an hour or so now and then I just go outside and reconnect with myself and get back to creating my beautiful life. I am happy and grateful to be manifesting love, joy and magical gardens. Oh yes and, of course, a healthy, strong, lithe and beautiful body, mind and spirit!